My last day was spent at rehearsal. And what a great rehearsal to end this leg of my journey with Tectonic.
We worked TLP's 1st and 3rd acts. Great arcs for Kelli's/my characters so I felt really good on ending on that work. I got to play, because with Leigh directing, I feel I can play a little more. And I knew they weren't gonna hold me back on my last day!
Accessing emotion is something I've become very interested in. Everytime certain actors read or act certain texts, myself and usually most of the cast are deeply hit with emotion - with tears. Greg, when he does Rulon Stacey - there is a rawness that I don't think most actors would retain after performing the same role for 10 years. It's quite incredible, the deep set connection.
Similarly for me, when I performed certain speeches - and interestingly enough, Kelli would do this to - I would get choked up 'in character' at the text.
This is a weird and wonderful thing, but one has to be incredibly careful that we're not bashing the audience over the head with grief. They can feel the grief sure, but too much of the actors doing it and it becomes a bit redundant. A bit gratuitous.
I actually have to go get on the plane now but will continue this soon as.
As I continue this post, It's now 9am Sunday the 29th of August in Auckland, New Zealand and it's cold!!! A rather good flight. I actually slept about 3 hours which is progress for me. Still, am operating on coffee, not rest. I have encountered a possible glitch though. I was checked in at NYC airport to LA - American Airlines had lost my booking so I had to go through a whole cuffuffle, which was fine. The lady dealing with me was super nice and let me get away with baggage over its limit and sent my baggage straight through to Auckland so I wouldn't be lugging it around. When I got to LA, 6 and a half hours later, I was told to go down to the Qantas shuttle bus. I did. The Helen Clarke-esq Aussie Qantas said I was in the wrong place. But that my flight was literally right upstairs! That I didn't have to change terminals. She checked me in and then I was left with the sleep deprived decision of what to do for 5 and half hours while waiting for my next flight. I decided to purchase a day pass to the Qantas lounge which was great. Meant I could relax, eat, drink, talk and email. Wise decision.
I should probably say that I had got home at 4am after a great night out. Hence epic sleep deprivation. After rehearsal, I went home, took a stab at packing, then rushed out to meet Samone and Darren for dinner and drinks at my fav NYC place Shalel - Moroccan delight. They paid for all which was super great coz the cocktails I was ordering did not come cheap! We talked theatre then I nipped home to do most of packing and met Katie and J in the Meatpacking district. Actually, at the SoHo club, which is super exclusive. I was thankful I'd dressed in my Jackie O ensemble so I fitted in. I also had recently got rid of my gawdy brown satchel which was inhibiting entry to such places!!!! A nice black handbag for $10.
Anyway, we had some lovely drinks there - J forking out for everything. He did all night actually. Even $20 for my cab back to Upper West. We then went to Kiss'n'Fly. A really pretentious (in that they don't let people in, pretending they're full etc if they don't look the part or don't have the monies) but very fun, good dance music sort of place. I loved it coz I danced up a storm and got attention from beautiful foreigners. An attractive Frenchman named Phillipe and a hot, but insane Dutchy. I forget his name. But there was the most frightening thing: Without warning, they high speed gun sprayed the room with dry ice, which was cold, and you couldn't see, it was just white, bright. Now, granted, I was tipsy, but I seriously thought the place had been bombed. I went down to the floor and stayed there until it stopped. I don't know why club owners do such things. Unique selling point my foot.
Anyway, we then went to a dingy 80s disco and then to Ella's, where I disgraced myself last time. But the dance floor was not happening, so Katie and I made our own one and I got talking to this total babe from Philly. But then the hour of dawn was upon us. The others wanted to karaoke, but I was wise and made tracks. In the morn, Olivia shouted me brunch. Was lovely. Even though we both felt the burn of the night before. Amusing event happened; an unkempt man in a hospital scrubs top and jeans stopped and was talking to two ladies who were eating outside. They clearly knew each other, just not very well, it was a hello, how are you, goodbye, sort of convo. Just as they were wrapping it up, the manager rushes outside and says 'Please don't harass the customers! Shoo!' This man looks dumbfounded and then extremely loudly says 'F**k off you mother f**ker. How dare you! What you're judging me cause of how I look?! I know these ladies.' and continues on. The manager doesn't believe until the ladies pipe up uncertainly that yes they do know him and this whole situation was very embarrassing.
Ok, so back to my travelling. So I get on the plane, it's about 1 or 2am NY time. So I'm tired. I managed to sleep. I watch a couple of movies, the whole trip is tres smooth. Ok, so my predicament is, that the airline never put me through customs in America and I think I have to get my passport taken through to register I've left the country. I went through security and all that jazz, just no customs. I'm going to contact the US embassy in Wgtn first thing tomorrow and take all my documentation in with me and hopefully that'll all be fine. Crossing fingers. I love that country and I don't want to be denied any more awesome holidays!!!!!
Ok, so now I've vented about that, I'll attempt to wrap up some more Tectonic stuff.
After running through and working extensively on parts of TLP. We then started to do a run of TLP:10 as a refresher. The mood wasn't great. We'd come back after a 1.5hour lunch break - everyone was full - they'd taken me out for a HUGE Thai lunch. So nice - and most were not in the mood. It was the most hideous run. Everything was going so badly, we all got the giggles. At the 'interval.' Leigh put everyone on a break. We came back and we were not going to be doing the 2nd half, which I knew made sense but was a bit gutted coz there was a juicy speech I had been working on. But, instead, I'm exceptionally grateful, because - if you've been reading this, you would've noticed I've been harping on about purpose within the work and the lack of it.
WEll, that was the discussion that took place. How there was no cohesiveness in the form of what they'd created and it was acknowledged that it had kinda been a rushed job. Because the play had been written, initially, as a 20 minute play. A tack on to TLP. Then it was full length and made for staged readings - which worked brilliantly and was v successful, because there was a clear form already set up and the script, though wonderful in parts, was still in development. So Leigh then brought the idea to the company - What if the characters were responding to the questions they had asked in Part one? What if we incorporated parts of the TLP text. This grew a level of excitement in the room. There was amazing debate and discussion on how to make it work for the performers purpose, the piece's purpose and so we can unite the audience and performers. It is all the stuff I'm interested in and was so glad it was addressed. They were all so supportive of Leigh and rewrites. Which is great, because they perform the thing in a couple of weeks and as soon as she said 'rewrites' I got nervous, because I knew the actors were not loving the subtle rewrites of scenes. But this is working towards the greater good so EVERYONE was on board.
So here is where the play lies now. Where I left it:
It is going to echo TLP: Part One. A reprisal. We have to teach the audience the form at the beginning so it can stand alone as a piece - not just as a tag-on to TLP. And doing this by fixing it theatrically
The reason it is being done is that events/moments like this one - the questions, events and consequences surrounding Matthew Shepard's murder - makes, for everyone connected with it (close and far,) fly in the face of who you think you are. Like 9/11, like natural disasters, like sicknesses.
Zubaida Ula has a speech in TLP 1 - about how WE are, how we need to own our mistakes. "We are LIKE this. We ARE like this. WE are LIKE THIS." So we try to answer that and ask new questions with 10 years perspective.
New questions:
WHAT IS AN ANNIVERSARY?
HOW DO YOU CELEBRATE THEM?
HOW DO WE RECLAIM IDENTITY?
HOW CAN WE THEATRICALIZE HOW THE CHARACTERS HAVE CHANGED IN THE LAST 10 YEARS?
The form of reprisal. About time passing.
So exciting.
As they were wrapping up, I asked if I could say a few words. I got up and spoke with purpose, clarity and strength. No wombliness.
I spoke to what they ahd just been talking about and how I strive for that sense of purpose in all my work. I spoke to how I've learnt so much from them, I'm still in the process of figuring out exactly what I'd learnt, I spoke to how working with them on stage was a terrific gift that I am so grateful for, that they gave me generosity and opportunity. And I spoke to The Laramie Project. And how a piece of work can be so engaging 10 years on. And how it can touch someone in New Zealand, enough to fly across the world and volunteer for free with them.
This has been the most educational holiday and has affected me and changed me. I don't know how much yet.
It was hard financially, I worked hard before I left NZ but America is an expensive place... but totally worth it. I got to experience America in a unique way. Through the eyes of artists in Steamboat Springs, Colorado and in New York City. I got to see small town vs large city. I met beautiful people from all walks of life. And I feel all the more richer for it.
As I finish this paragraph, I am sitting in my mother's sitting room in Owhiro Bay, Wellington. It is stormy, cold, elemental. The sea is crashing on the shore. The chimney is whistling from the wind. BBC is showing Barack Obama in his tribute to the anniversary of Hurricane Katrina.
Thank God for opportunities. Thank friends and family for support. And I thank myself for doing it all, and making sure it happens.
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